El Macho

 

– Thank you for accepting our invitation and being interviewed.

– With pleasure. I hope the contractual amount of money will soon arrive to my account.

– Yes, in a week … Are you always so straightforward?

– Of course, but you can say the word, that you politely tried to avoid. Don’t beat around the bush. Materialistic. Like the world we live in. Everyone wants to get money. You are not asking these questions for  free. Get paid, right? Now we are talking! And I suppose I’m not the only one interviewee. At least you are lucky with me. I’m smart. I can imagine how stupid answers can be given by others.

– Well, yeah. It happens, but I can handle the situations. Are you always so self-confident?

– Why should not I be? You know, I have reason to behave like this.

– And judging by your words, you are materialistic.

-As I mentioned before.  Not paying attention? Listen to me! In our world everything and everyone has a price, but the amount is in question.

– How much is your price?

– Well, it depends on the nature of the service – he  laughed. – But of course, my charming personality can be expressed by a certain amount.

– What amount do you think?

– Can be seen from the Moon, as well! – he laughed again.

– But tell me a sum!

– Fifty thousand.

– In Hungarian Forint, I think?

– Wait a minute! I just called to say an amount, not to specify the currency! If you want an accurate answer, you should ask exactly!

– All right. What currency do you mean?

– Let be £!

– Don’t you think that you a bit overrate yourself?

– Impossible.

– Do you think, you are a good-looking guy?

– Why? You do not share my views?

– I’m not here to judge you.

– But you are embarrassed. I can see that blush.

– Are you always behave like this? With women. I mean.

– What do you mean by that?

– In a frank almost provocative way.

– I behave  with everyone this way. This is my true face. My personality. I am blunt. I do not usually make a slip in speaking and act unnecessary. That’s it.

– So are you playing cards on the table?

– Yes. I do not like telling lies, and make no secret of my opinion.

– And do you have a strong opinion about everything?

– Yes, of course. Do not you?

– And what if someone does not share your views? Can you handle dissents?

– This word is out of my dictionary! But we are not identical, we do not think in the same way, I admit it.

– So do you stand for honesty. Do you never pretend anything ?

– Is it a question? Are you kidding? You know just as well as I do, that everyone wears a mask and act. It is a dangerous thing to be yourself. You can be abused. Mask is a way of protection.

– So you are mistrustful, aren’t you?

– I absolutely trust in myself. I know why I do things and what’s right and what’s not.

– I meant the others.

– Everyone else is a pretender. Then there is nothing to do but accept the game rules. And if everyone plays a role on the stage of life , just think it over,would anybody believe me that I am honest? Such is life! On the other hand, honesty can be dangerous. you can be abused. You do know it at least as well as I do!

– Let’s get back to the women’s thread.

– O.K. I like it.  Although I thought – being a woman – you prefer men. Just kidding! What about the women?

– What is your opinion about us?

-Should I lie or be honest?

– Of course, I expect an honest answer!

– Well, it depends on the woman, you know a woman gave birth to me, but there are general rules.

– What rules do you think?

– We, the man and the woman, think very differently ways. You know that we’re hunters and seedsmen – you know what I mean -, while women are nest builders, and try to find the best mate.

– And does he exist? Matching partner.

– There are more. But it is always the time that shows the true value of a relationship. Therefore does not make sense to give great importance to it.  Time will show you how true that love was.

– Do you believe in true love? Or have ever believed in?

– Do you mean that my mum read me bedtime stories when I was a little boy? Yes, of course! Once upon a time a charming Prince was riding on his white horse, and the Princess fell in love, one week later they married and they lived happily ever after. But not in our real world.

– It sounds cynical.

– I am. But cynicism is not a disease, but a weapon against stupidity. Everyone thinks that one shold be afraid getting slapped. If someone biffes you, the slap marks will fade soon, butone can kill with words. They hurt your soul.

– Do you really think so?

– Why do you think I’m kidding?

– No, but it seems to me you are really a strong man. One would think that you can try to solve problems by brawn.

– Oh, I never  fight. I do not want to solve a problem with force. Why should I? If someone is stupid, that is his problem, not mine. The point is that I have to see the things clear. Nobody can fool me: neither a politician nor a bank, not a woman.

– So are you sure of yourself and are you always right?

– Well, I can be wrong, but it has not occurred yet.

– Not about women?

– Oh, come on! What a stupid question again! I have already told you: we are different – the man and the woman. You know, it’s related to genetics. There is not nothing to explain about it: biochemistry, hormones, pheromones … It’s so simple. Of course, nowadays sense of smell hasn’t got so much importance than it used to have. You know one has a bath every day bath, uses shower gel, perfume …

– Yes, I get it. Your perfume smells great.

– That’s why I use it. But it would be nice if you did not interrupt me while I want to express my thoughts. In my opinion nowadays appearance is the most importan thing. That is why you are dressed up, wearing high heels shoes, make up. And I go to the gymn with my pals. Although you might not realise that.

– And do you have a proven recipe ? I mean dating.

– As you have for bake a cake? Let’s just say that professional secrecy. Otherwise, believe me. If I start courting you, you will realise that. But I have no moonshine. If there is affection, sympathy between a man and a woman, anyway it works. If it doesn’t work, why should I force it? Am I right? Can you see I’m right again!

– And what is the secret of a lasting relationship?

– If I knew it, I would not share it with anyone for free. If I had it, I would make a fortune by that. But I tell you again that harmony is all that matters. You know, harmony between two souls.

– I can’t believe that  you’re serious!

– Why? Just because I am handsome? For God’s sake! But I can have soul and heart! Have I given you a reason to doubt in my words? And you can ask anything.

– Anything? Is that true?

– Yes of course! But I may refuse to answer. But you can ask. Idon’t limit anyone’s rights.

– Then the last question is: What do you think of the perfect man?

– No, you can quickly took a photo of me with your  smart-phone, and you can get the answer. I’m gone!

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